Sanath works as a software engineer for a MNC in Bangalore, India. Someday, he wants to drive BMW, be at the helm of some company and lead a posh life style. Currently, with his moderate salary he has to feed his parents and 3 brothers. His father is a farmer who is currently under huge debt that he made due to repeated crop failures, few wrong market based decisions and of course alcohol. Now Sanath has to ensure that he pays back his father's debts and fulfill his own dreams. His parents are after him to get married so that with the dowry that they will get out of his marriage could be used to repay their debts. But he don't wants to marry now, as he know that with his present finance he can't live a good life with his wife and most importantly he's against the idea of dowry. So till now some how he has successfully averted the marriage, sometime by delaying his visit to his home place, sometime by rejecting proposals and sometime by other means. But he don't know how long he could do that. Sometimes when he get good proposals (Beautiful Girl & Good family) he forgets his condition and agree to get married but the girl's side don't agree to give him their daughter considering his family condition.
Sanath's problem is quite complex, he can't marry a girl who is not beautiful, he can't marry a girl who is rich but not educated, his parents won't be ready to accept a girl who is beautiful and educated but not rich, so he wants to marry a girl who is rich, educated and beautiful :) But why a rich and educated family will give their daughter to Sanath's family? The problem for Sanath doesn't stop here, he is slowly realizing that IT is not the kind of field where he fits in well. He is not just made for this industry. But now he can't leave this industry as he's under huge pressure from all sides. He can't pursue further studies considering his family financial conditions. He can't change the industry as he know he's not eligible for any other industry, his tenure in IT has made him like that :P. I am sure Sanath is not an isolated case, one can find thousands of Sanath in India.
There are few things which needs to be analyzed here, as to why he's facing all these in his life. Firstly, his father was a farmer. Our farmers are revered as "Jai Kisan" but only on Republic/Independence Day speeches, practically they are the most neglected ones and treated very poorly by everyone in the society. I am not blaming the Govt. alone. Think of us, we spend 50 bucks or more for a cup of Coffee at CCD but always bargain with the poor farmers for even Rs 1. If our kids say he wants to become a farmer, shall we allow him to do that? 99.99% of parents will say a firm "NO". No doubt about it. If we really believe in "Jai Kisan", then it should not have been the case. However, we as a society whenever think of celebrating we do that with a party!!! Remember, we can't party if we don't have Kisans!!! As far as Govt. is concerned it can do a lot for farmers if it intends to do so, but let's not get into that.
Secondly, Sanath choose something as his career for which he don't have natural inclination. When he grew as a student, he saw that IT professionals make handsome money and if he pursues a career in IT then he can make money so that he can repay all his father's debt and create a posh life for himself and his family. But he ended up with an unsatisfying professional career and unsatisfying personal life.
Thirdly, his family's mind set to sell their Son in marriage market to find a short-cut solution for all the problems. But you can't blame them alone for this mind set. We as a society has to be blamed for this as our society approves these.
What is satisfying to me is that, while interacting with Sanath, I found that he's still fond of farming but he can't dare to do that because of the huge risks involved in farming and if he does farming his status in village will be diminished!!! ooops!!! Here again we failed as a society to inspire him to pursue a life of a farmer which is equally meaningful and respectable as any other job on this earth or may be better!!!
This is based on a true story but the name has been changed.
Sanath's problem is quite complex, he can't marry a girl who is not beautiful, he can't marry a girl who is rich but not educated, his parents won't be ready to accept a girl who is beautiful and educated but not rich, so he wants to marry a girl who is rich, educated and beautiful :) But why a rich and educated family will give their daughter to Sanath's family? The problem for Sanath doesn't stop here, he is slowly realizing that IT is not the kind of field where he fits in well. He is not just made for this industry. But now he can't leave this industry as he's under huge pressure from all sides. He can't pursue further studies considering his family financial conditions. He can't change the industry as he know he's not eligible for any other industry, his tenure in IT has made him like that :P. I am sure Sanath is not an isolated case, one can find thousands of Sanath in India.
There are few things which needs to be analyzed here, as to why he's facing all these in his life. Firstly, his father was a farmer. Our farmers are revered as "Jai Kisan" but only on Republic/Independence Day speeches, practically they are the most neglected ones and treated very poorly by everyone in the society. I am not blaming the Govt. alone. Think of us, we spend 50 bucks or more for a cup of Coffee at CCD but always bargain with the poor farmers for even Rs 1. If our kids say he wants to become a farmer, shall we allow him to do that? 99.99% of parents will say a firm "NO". No doubt about it. If we really believe in "Jai Kisan", then it should not have been the case. However, we as a society whenever think of celebrating we do that with a party!!! Remember, we can't party if we don't have Kisans!!! As far as Govt. is concerned it can do a lot for farmers if it intends to do so, but let's not get into that.
Secondly, Sanath choose something as his career for which he don't have natural inclination. When he grew as a student, he saw that IT professionals make handsome money and if he pursues a career in IT then he can make money so that he can repay all his father's debt and create a posh life for himself and his family. But he ended up with an unsatisfying professional career and unsatisfying personal life.
Thirdly, his family's mind set to sell their Son in marriage market to find a short-cut solution for all the problems. But you can't blame them alone for this mind set. We as a society has to be blamed for this as our society approves these.
What is satisfying to me is that, while interacting with Sanath, I found that he's still fond of farming but he can't dare to do that because of the huge risks involved in farming and if he does farming his status in village will be diminished!!! ooops!!! Here again we failed as a society to inspire him to pursue a life of a farmer which is equally meaningful and respectable as any other job on this earth or may be better!!!
This is based on a true story but the name has been changed.
Amazing post... So true.. Hard hitting facts
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